Poking Jesus at the Breakfast Table

This week was like many of our other weeks here in Moscow.  There were days that were good..days that were bad and days that Russians would call "nee-chee-vo" (a great Russian word that means that things have not changed and are just "normal.")  Our language skills are improving and we can now hold a pretty meaningful conversation in Russian...as long as we are speaking to a 3-year old!  And, we are looking forward to speaking with several of our partner churches this week and next as part of the Lottie Moon Christmas Offering emphasis that Southern Baptists have during the Christmas season.

This week as I was getting ready for my language class and the kids were at the kitchen table eating breakfast I overheard a conversation that has tickled me all week long.  As usual, John was picking on his sisters, and as usual they didn't like it.  This was the dialogue that followed:

Kellye:  John, that does not make Jesus very happy when you do that.

John:  I wasn't doing it to Jesus.  I was doing it to Hannah!

Now if you are a regular reader of our blogs you will know that Kellye is generally the one with deep theological insights (Jesus and taco night is my favorite.)  But this one has been eating at me all week long because I am so guilty of saying the same thing as John...over and over again.  You would think that after nearly 40 years I would stop saying it.  But how many times a week do we find ourselves getting caught in our sin and responding the same ways as John-John.  "I wasn't doing it to Jesus..."  But the reality is that when we turn our focus off God, even for just a split second, we are no different than the six-year-old caught poking his sister at the breakfast table.

This morning as I was walking to the grocery store I was listening to John MacArthur teach about Christmas.  His sermon, entitled, the ugliness of Christmas reminded us that while we try to paint Christmas as something beautiful the reality is that Christmas was necessary because we have sinned.  If our lives were not tainted with the blackness and ugliness of sin then there would not be a reason for Jesus.  Man would still live in The Garden and God would not have had to put on human flesh for the sole purpose of becoming a sacrifice for our sins.  

Now for a moment of sheer honesty and transparency.  I was the one this week who said "Why are we even here?" and then I added that I was feeling like God had made a mistake by sending us."  Guess what, folks.  I was tired, frustrated, homesick, angry, sad, disappointed, and a million other negative emotions.  I was yelling at my family and was not really thinking about God all that much, except for to be pretty upset with him for bringing me to a place where I do not feel like I excel in ANYTHING.  But the reality is that in that moment when John answered my question by saying "Because God told us to" I broke down and felt tears coming to my eyes.  Not because my feelings had changed, but because I knew that what I was really saying was "I didn't do it to Jesus..." But I was and he was sad.

So I had to come to grips with some stuff this week.  First, we are here to stay and to imply otherwise is a sin...no matter how I am FEELING that day.  Secondly, there will be hard days and that is alright.  But most importantly, when we are feeling selfish, having a pity party, or any of other multitudes of sins, we are not just doing those things to ourselves, or to our family and friends, but we are doing them to Jesus as well.  The same Jesus who lay in a manger and the same Jesus who hung on a cross.  But most importantly, the same Jesus who left an empty tomb on Easter Sunday morning and who lives even today!

It is funny what you can learn from your kids at the breakfast table.